Friday, May 11, 2007
I love the 'Grandma Song,' ("Better Days" sung by Dianne Reeves). In addition to it reminding me of my own Nana, and enjoying the music, I like the point Ms. Reeves is trying to make. Grandma is teaching her granddaughter that she must be patient in order to achieve the important things in life. In order to get to better days ahead, you may have to suffer through the night. A very important lesson for young people, but also for adults. Patience. Be patient. Especially if it is to attain something important. Even if it is not so important. Be patient while you wait in line, wait in traffic, wait for your spouse. Patience is especially important in relationships. Not just waiting for them to clean up before going out to dinner, but also in trying to get them to see things your way. Use patience while negotiating a compromise to something you two may disagree about. You have to be patient with your kids, with your parents, your friends. This will help the relationship flow more smoothly. Very important in new relationships too. Be patient and get to know the person, before diving into emotional entanglements, and premature commitments. This may be difficult for those of us who are used to not wasting a minute of our time, or may be quick tempered. Take a breath. Slowing down is healthier for us, helps us make better decisions, and helps us experience the here-and-now more completely. Which, as you know, comes and goes so quickly that we often miss out on a lot. Sometimes we have regrets about the time we missed, perhaps with loved ones. Patience is a virtue. I guess that means that it is a very good thing, a strength, especially in the world today. We rush and rush, and miss out on a lot. Whereas if we take it slow the experience is more complete, more real. Take your time to make it through the night, before rushing to get to the "better days."
Sunday, May 6, 2007
You do not need any 'drama' on Mother's Day. I have been fortunate enough to have a good caring mother, and I want her and you to be able to relax and enjoy the day. And although it's Mother's Day, I think it's o.k. for everyone else to relax and enjoy the Day too. That means that whatever you're doing to celebrate your mother, should not be so complex, nor last-minute, or just not well thought out enough that it stresses everyone, including, most importantly on that day, YOUR MOTHER! If you're getting a gift, going out to eat, preparing a special meal, or doing something with the kids. Then shop, make the reservation, and get everything in place soon (actually, Mother's Day is next Sunday, so you should do it now). Mom, this goes for you too, if you are (yet again) going to have to arrange things. And get the kids to at least help. I think the goal is to have a day where it's understood that Mom gets taken care of by those people that she's been taking care of. So don't make your mom have to break up fights. Let her have a day where there's no arguing about anything she disagrees with. Don't make her clean up after you. You clean up after her. And Dad's take the lead on this. Bend over backwards to avoid fights, help make her day a stress-free one, and celebrate her (our Day's coming soon). Mom, you accept nothing less. It's called MOTHER'S Day for a reason. Mom's work double and triple time, 365 days a year. You have a week to prepare some celebration of her role in your life. Or, if necessary, Mom you have a week to plan a day where you celebrate the very important role that you play in your family's life. Don't let them bring you any drama on your Day.