SLOW DOWN, ... WHAT'S THE RUSH?

"Patience is a virtue." Our parents used to say that when we were kids. Trying to get us to slow down, not to need things so immediately. It seems like many of us didn't learn from that. In fact we've even abbreviated the phrase, now it's "chill out." We rush here. We rush there. Not only do people speed around in their cars, but also can't wait until they get home to make that phone call. Or even wait to write that letter they want to send, so they're texting while they drive (read my posting of 09/16/08, Don't Text While Driving). OMG! Slow down.




Our need for immediate gratification sometimes causes us problems. We rush through relationships. People are "falling in love" before they know each other for a few months, sometimes even before they meet thanks to the internet (for more on the need for patience in relationships, read my posting of 5/11/07, Make It Through The Night, To Make It To Better Days). And we've learned a lot about the health hazards of "fast" food, and those "crash" diets. The hurried life style also contributes to a lot of anxiety. We worry so much about what's going to happen in the future that we miss out on enjoying the present. So whenever you're feeling rushed, or worried about tomorrow, take a deep breath, and acknowledge your life in the here and now. Be mindful of the good things in your life now ( see Turn Off The Lights, from 7/10/08 for more on mindfulness). In fact, don't rush off right now to do the next thing you have planned. Take a few minutes to appreciate your life. Remember: Good things come to those who wait!

Make It Through The Night, To Make It To Better Days...

I love the 'Grandma Song,' ("Better Days" sung by Dianne Reeves). In addition to it reminding me of my own Nana, and enjoying the music, I like the point Ms. Reeves is trying to make. Grandma is teaching her granddaughter that she must be patient in order to achieve the important things in life. In order to get to better days ahead, you may have to suffer through the night. A very important lesson for young people, but also for adults. Patience. Be patient. Especially if it is to attain something important. Even if it is not so important. Be patient while you wait in line, wait in traffic, wait for your spouse. Patience is especially important in relationships. Not just waiting for them to clean up before going out to dinner, but also in trying to get them to see things your way. Use patience while negotiating a compromise to something you two may disagree about. You have to be patient with your kids, with your parents, your friends. This will help the relationship flow more smoothly. Very important in new relationships too. Be patient and get to know the person, before diving into emotional entanglements, and premature commitments. This may be difficult for those of us who are used to not wasting a minute of our time, or may be quick tempered. Take a breath. Slowing down is healthier for us, helps us make better decisions, and helps us experience the here-and-now more completely. Which, as you know, comes and goes so quickly that we often miss out on a lot. Sometimes we have regrets about the time we missed, perhaps with loved ones. Patience is a virtue. I guess that means that it is a very good thing, a strength, especially in the world today. We rush and rush, and miss out on a lot. Whereas if we take it slow the experience is more complete, more real. Take your time to make it through the night, before rushing to get to the "better days."