Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Homework, Not My Job (Back-To-School Lesson 5)

Your child's homework is your child's responsibility. The sooner they know that (and you know it too), the sooner they'll be more responsible in getting it done. If you do it for them now, you'll be doing it forever, or at least until the schoolwork gets to be too advanced for you. Then who's going to do it? By then it may be too late for them to develop the good study and homework skills that they need in order to do well. I am not suggesting that you be totally uninvolved, but your child needs to learn early on that getting homework done correctly, turning it in, and knowing how much studying to do (and making time for it) is their job, not yours. This includes them knowing when to ask for help. The younger they are, the more "hands-on" involvement may be necessary. It is important to check their work, and to be available if they need help. Also if getting it done has been a problem in the past, it makes sense to develop a contract which includes rewards and consequences for putting in (or not) the necessary effort.
Generally, I suggest allowing the teacher to handle the consequences of your child not handing their work in (or doing poorly on a test), unless the teacher needs your help. Keep in mind that sometimes school failure is a sign of a deeper problem. Make sure you are aware of any stresses that may be influencing your child's school performance. And help them manage it before it develops into a larger problem for your child and your family. Getting homework done should not be a struggle. It should not be too difficult for him or her to do. And remember, it is not your job.

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